Ladies and Lords of Leisure

I thought this article from NW Jobs was a good read for anyone who’s feeling stuck in their job and possibly “clinging to their own, hard-earned rung” on the social ladder for reasons unknown. A few questions to ask yourself: 

1. What are you holding on to? Is it the familiarity of something? If so, what? Is it a feeling of something, fitting in?
2. What do you gain from it? Is it social status? Money? Comfort in knowing what to expect each day? Acceptance from others?
3. What is keeping you from getting or doing other aspirations? As long as you keep doing this work, what else don’t you get to do or have?
4. What will you lose if you give it up? Respect? Money? An identity? A particular group of friends?
5. Is what you lose worth more than the new career satisfaction you want?

In my experience, taking a risk and trying out something new is not a bad thing. Yeah, I know I’m not working full time anymore as a massage therapist and perhaps for some of you that can be seen as a failure. And, it’s a thought I struggle with daily – believe me – especially when I haven’t done a massage in over a month! But, what I try to remind myself is that I took the chance and jumped in order to get answers to those questions. I’d rather have answers than sit wonderland. Wonderland is crap. It makes you miserable…so JUMP!

So as you know, I went back to an office job on December 8th and just wanted to answer some of your questions (see below). The overview though is that I’m actually really happy working full time again and not just for the steady, non-state funded paycheck. Turns out one side of my brain, or parts of both, were slightly atrophied (and possibly bored) which is never a good thing. And now, both sides of my brain are working again. The left side is being extremely strategic, organized, absorbing and spewing insane amounts of information on a daily basis, which has in turn kick-started my creative right brain.

Now, to answer some of your questions.

Q: Where am I working? I’m working at a marketing consulting firm in Pioneer Square, where I had worked previously about 4 or 5 years ago as a contractor after my Expedia layoff and before Microsoft Zune. I always liked the people at this place and there’s a variety of work to keep a busy-brained-bee like me entertained.

Q: What am I doing exactly? I think my official title is a Customer Engagement Marketing Consultant and right now I’m managing case study development and customer reference & testimonial programs for various clients. 

Q: Is this place hiring? Yes, they are hiring so if you’re an unemployed marketing, project management or writing professional who’s looking for a great place to work, send me an email with your resume and I’ll see if I can help get you in the door.

Q: How is the transition from LMP to desk jockey going? It’s hard – I am not going to lie! After not working in the technology field for close to two years, I feel like I’ve got my mouth to the fire hose on a daily basis. But, I just keep reminding myself that I’m new and still learning the ropes of this job and that hopefully soon, I’ll settle into my new shoes. 

Q: What about massage – are you still doing that? The answer is yes. I am still doing massage, but it’s become very much a part-time job – every other weekend kind of thing. It’s difficult to make a living doing massage full time, unless you have your own booming practice (or a sugar daddy!), which takes time, money and a strong desire to build and maintain. After being unemployed for 1.5 years, I had no more time, money, desire or patience to start a practice and as I mentioned in an earlier post, the financial burden I was carrying was killing me. Now, with massage, it’s a completely different experience for me. There’s no more pressure to make money so I can pay my mortgage. Now it’s all about the client and addressing their needs. Alleviating some of their pain, restoring range of motion or simply giving them an opportunity to relax. It’s the best of both worlds.

I hope that answers some of your questions and if you have any more, please drop me a line.

This was an email forward I got the other day and it made me laugh so hard so thought it was worth sharing. Enjoy and happy holidays!

Sometimes, we try too hard to get to the greener grass.  In the process, we end up in trouble.

And when you find yourself in trouble and you’re stuck in a situation that you can’t get out of, there is one thing you should always remember:

Not everyone who shows up…Is there to help you!!!! 

Ok, a friend of mine just pointed out that there’s apparently a NEW level of house pant out there called the freaking Pajama Jean! (Couple notes – “freaking” isn’t part of the brand name and if you click on the link, be forewarned that a video on the homepage will auto-run).  You know, they actually look pretty stylish if you’re ok with the fake fly (sorry Lords of Leisure, looks like these  jeans are only designed for the ladies and as you know, we don’t need no stinkin’ fly). And, the price is right for the unemployed at $40 plus S&H – hell, maybe a good holiday gift for your unemployed friend who desperately needs to upgrade their house pants collection. These pants raise the bar on house pants – I think we have a level 6 people! 

Now, if you’re employed, maybe these pants would work as a white elephant gift. They would pair nicely with a set of Handerpants, a Shake Weight or the good old Snuggie. My god that would be one sweet emsemble!  

(Warning: long post today…lots to say!) First, I should let everyone know that this past Tuesday, I accepted a full time position as an employee with an amazing marketing and consulting firm in Pioneer Square. Yes, I know that I went to school to become a massage therapist after my layoff in 2009. And I also know that I vowed that I would never again work behind a desk for “corporate America.” But you know what? Circumstances changed and if I wasn’t willing to adapt to these changed circumstances, I was going to lead a miserable life. In fact, I was already starting to go down that path. 

The entire month of November, I was fully imploding mentally, physically and emotionally from the stress brought about by the possibility of financial ruin. Losing my home, fully depleting my savings account, no more unemployment funding on the horizon and a new career that was financially unreliable maybe grossing $300 on a good week. To cope with this stress, I became very self-destructive which ultimately brought me to one of the lowest points in my life – that god damn burned pizza pie incident about two weeks ago. While I make light of that story, the reality is that I could have died and I would likely have if died had I gone through with the decision to cancel the ADT home security monitoring to cut costs so that I didn’t lose my home.   

Why am I telling you this story? Because that charred pizza pie incident was a wake up call for me, so in a sense I guess it saved my life. After crying every day for about two weeks post pizza incident (and prior to pizza incident…yes, depression is real people), I realized that I had to make some changes if I wanted to survive. Great, more changes. More fucking decisions. I said to the universe or powers that be, “Really? Isn’t losing a job, a relationship, going back to school, changing careers and failing miserably enough in a year and a half? Do you really expect me to pull some miracle out of my ass? Isn’t that YOUR job, Mr. Universe? And how in the hell do you expect me to muster the courage and determination to keep fighting when I can’t get out of bed or go more than two hours without crying?” The answer I got from the mothership was “You are at the bottom and going up is the only decision you have to make. I will do the rest. So, wipe your eyes, blow your nose, take a shower and for god sakes PLEASE get out of your house pants! Let’s go find you a job so that you can live the life you want. And by the way, you didn’t fail at massage. You are an amazing massage therapist and once we lift that financial burden that you’re carrying, you will be an even better one.”

The next week, I got a lead for a marketing  job from a good friend of mine and it was for a company I had worked for in 2006. I knew the owner, sent her an email of interest along with my resume, interviewed and four days later I was employed. Funny how life works, isn’t it?

Do you know what I’m most excited about? The super nice HR person at my new company would think I’m happiest about the fact that I finally get to buy some new clothes cuz I raved about the fact that I needed to move away from house pants in our first meeting yesterday. But that’s not it. I’m excited about the fact that I feel happy. I feel relieved. I feel like a more well rounded person. I feel lucky to have a job that pays double of what I got on unemployment. I feel lucky to work in a small company with a great group of people and I still get to practice massage. I’m proud of myself for not giving up, for mustering the courage and persevering even in the most difficult times.  And I couldn’t have done any of this without the support of my family and friends so thank you all!

CWI stands for Cooking While Intoxicated and the result of my efforts to CWI this past Saturday night are shown below. This is…or was…a pizza. When cooked to perfection, pizza is a drunkard’s dream at 2am after a long night out on the town.  Also, a drunkard’s dream (if you are a woman or a gay man) is to have firemen show up at your house and rescue you, which also happened Saturday night. Sadly, they were rescuing me from my own CWI drunken stupidity.

I learned a few lessons that night. First and foremost, always go to bed looking proper, wearing your best pair of house pants(preferably level 4 or 5) not the ones that make you look like a tent or a household rag. Second, don’t CWI unless you have installed a ovenizer, which is a breathalyzerfor your oven. And third, remember that your ADT alarm code gets entered into the alarm keypad…not your cell phone.  Although, according to a friend of mine, there’s probably a mobile app for that.

I am rad. Lesson learned. No more CWI.

Pizza: a drunkard's dream

I finally decided I’d better downgrade my Comcast T.V. to basic and guess what I get to watch now at 10am on Saturday, instead of Law & Order re-runs? That’s right – God shows, sewing shows and oh don’t forget the infomercials! Right now, The Shark Vac-Steam is really steaming it’s way into my heart! Damn-it! How is downgrading my Comcast going to help me save money when they put this incredibly powerful vacuum-steamer in front of me and my dirty house? LOL! OMG – and now, I kid you not, there’s an infomercial on about curing yourself from The Muffin Top and rear-end cleaveage when wearing jeans! ha ha ha ha ha!

Maybe I’d better turn to the Praise-a-thon…pray for money or will-power to resist purchasing these products, LOL!

Well, the search has officially begun for that second part-time job; the one in “the office” where it all happens. Where people talk on their cell phones while they are on the toilet or at the urinal. Where barefoot developers wander the office halls crop-dusting. Where someone microwaves their fish lunch and it stinks up the entire office building. Where daily one struggles to keep up with their email. Where you often lose sleep worrying about projects and deadlines. Yes, I hope to be part of this again, but this time it will be different.

Different for a number of reasons. I’ve done my career research, my soul-searching and know what I want (and need) to thrive. Variety. Learning. Flexibility. Working with people. Physical activity. Ability to travel. Creativity. Problem-solving. Curt Rosengren’s approach to finding career passion helped me come up with this list. And no, (for those of you looking for the answers or the easy way out!) he doesn’t just tell you what you should do. He gives you guidance by asking really amazing questions then provides you with a process to get there. How to refine all your thoughts, ideas, interests, dreams, etc. into something that’s useful. Then you do the work (this is the hardest part and what I spent half of 2009 doing, wearing house pants of course!).

Anyway, now that I actually KNOW the key pillars to finding or creating a meaningful career (and a meaningful life for that matter), I’ve decided that I need to design a composite career for myself, which can be defined as being a career that’s made up of more than one job. I need to design this type of career if I want to have all these things (Variety. Learning. Flexibility. Working with people. Physical activity. Ability to travel. Creativity. Problem-solving).

My massage career does meet many of these key elements, the obvious being it’s active and works with people. However, it’s not fulfilling all of my needs – at least not yet - and I’m already getting a little bored. Bored for a number of reasons. The first being that I don’t yet have a full client load, which is to be expected when you are first starting a massage career. This means that I don’t have income, which prevents me from taking continuing education classes that will give me tools to further develop and refine my craft. And having more tools helps breed creativity on the massage table. But creativity also comes in other forms – marketing. And this is another challenge that I seem to be experiencing mostly because I work for someone else. Someone who has no marketing plan and I don’t feel it’s my place to take this over because it’s his business even though I love the creative process behind developing a marketing plan and I need some marketing to happen for me to be successful at his establishment. I’d even be happy to develop and execute a marketing plan for him (which I told him), but he needs to be willing to pay me for my time.

Now here’s where that second job comes into play. LMP job feeds one part of the soul. Second job fills in some of those gaps (creativity, problem-solving, variety, etc.). And, more importantly, it will also feed the bank account, which will give me some financial breathing room.

Knowing yourself and what you want out of your career should be seen as a positive thing in the mind of the employer, right? I really hope I can convince employers that this composite career picture I have for myself is also ideal for them. Fingers crossed.

After my sixth massage interview – three chiropractors, one salon and two massage places – I finally felt really excited about one place. I had my final interview this past Friday, got offered a part-time job an hour after I left and happily accepted the position as I strolled Alki. I start next Thursday! Timing for this offer is impeccable though because I still had two quality job prospects sitting out there and both responded with interview requests the DAY AFTER I accepted this position on Friday. (Sigh) But, I can only do so many massages a week without hurting my body, so I had to decline the interview requests. But it’s good to have made contact with these other places should I need to reach out to them in the future.

So…hello? I have my first job after not having a job for an entire year and a half! Holy shit – eek! Eek in a good way though because I finally get to start my career!  Weeeee!!!!!!!!!!

I know. Yoyo Robinson sounds a bit like a porn name. In fact, to come up with your porn name, I believe you are supposed to take the name of your first dog and add it to the street where you grew up. But, if you’re like me and your street name was a number, you just use your last name instead. Hence Yoyo Robinson.

But, this post isn’t really about porn, sorry fellas. It’s about me being a fucking yoyo. I’m up. I’m down. I’m up. I’m down. Seriously, I am fucking ridiculous right now. I feel like I’ve become bipolar thanks to unemployment. And the decision to change careers – whose brilliant idea was that? Oh yeah, MINE! But which me? Which personality of the day made that decision? Was it the confident Keri, who occiassionally sports big balls of steel? Or was it the pie-in-the-sky Keri, who has visions of sugarplums dancing in her head? (Brother Paul, don’t you dare answer that!)

To go from making $80k a year before the layoff to making a little over $2k a month on unemployment has been challenging in and of itself. (FYI…I don’t normally talk about my salary, but this info was made public in the Seattle Times piece so here it is again.) But, now that I’m starting to look for jobs in the massage field as the very green Kermit the Frog, I’m starting to see a whole new reality. The new reality being that I’m probably not going to make much more than what I’m making on unemployment!  WTF?

So now I can’t help but ask the question – why would I get a job? In fact, this blogger seems to be doing just fine on unemployment – I think he’s working on year three if you can believe that! He, of course, doesn’t have a mortgage so maybe he’s not as mentally fucked up as I am about finances. And, I don’t think he’s trying to change careers like me, which adds another level of stressball to the equation. Although, I guess in a way, every unemployed person changed careers. We went from being employed to being unemployed. Hmm…interesting. So I’ve actually made THREE career changes in one year. From a consumer PR manager to lady of leisure to licensed massage practitioner. Wow, I am in-fucking-credible! Look at all I’ve accomplished in a year’s time?!?!

God I really have A.D.D., don’t I? Anyway – I obviously need a job. I need two actually – one to pay my mortgage (massage job) and one to pay the other bills and feed my face while I develop my craft. So, I am officially looking for a part-time corporate marketing job. I know I said I’d never go back, but seems financially I have to until my massage practice takes off. 

Ok so now the big question: who wants to hire this lady of leisure for part-time marketing/project management work, knowing that a desk job isn’t my passion? This should be interesting…sigh.